Today, I want to learn about:
near me:
    
Category: Business / Careers
Views: 3375
Comments: 0 Favorited: 0
Average Rating:
You must be logged in to vote.
This MonthAverage: N/A, Votes: 0
All TimeAverage: .00, Votes: 0


Negotiating With Friends

» Introduction
When you negotiate with friends and loved ones, do you find the negotiation to be more difficult? Over the years, thousands of people have told me they consider themselves to be good negotiators, except when it comes to negotiating with someone they have strong emotional ties to. There are several phenomenons at work during these negotiations.
» Step 1
When you negotiate with friends and loved ones, do you find the negotiation to be more difficult? Over the years, thousands of people have told me they consider themselves to be good negotiators, except when it comes to negotiating with someone they have strong emotional ties to. There are several phenomenons at work during these negotiations.

It's more difficult to negotiate with people that you have strong emotional ties to for several reasons:

1. They have better insight into your psychic makeup and thus possess a greater awareness of how to push your buttons.

2. They can do things to you that others outside of your inner domain could never do (Read between the lines on this one).

3. During negotiations with loved ones and friends, you will tend not to negotiate as stringently as you might with people that don't fall into these categories.

So, how should you negotiate with those that are close to you and still maintain a civil relationship with them after the negotiation is over?

1. As with all negotiations, state the purpose of the negotiation up front. Indicate what is inbound (things that can be discussed) and things that are out of bounds (things that cannot be discussed). Hold fast to not discussing things that are out of bounds and get your friend or loved one to buy in to the boundaries of the negotiation.

2. State how you would like the relationship to be after the negotiation has concluded. Get them to buy in on this one, too.

3. Set the ground rules for the discussion of the negotiation (If you wish to be in a more positive position don't bring things into the current negotiation that occurred in the past).

4. As the negotiation progresses, monitor the level of emotions that occur, yours and your friend or loved one, to make sure those emotions are not used as ploys of manipulation against you.

5. As you acquiesce to the wishes of your friend or loved one, make sure they really want what they say they want. (You can get a good read on their desires by observing and interpreting their body language). Don't allow them to use red herrings as a ploy to gain additional leverage over you (Note: Red herrings are items that appear to possess value by your negotiation partner, but more than not, they serve to distract attention from the real issue).

6. Observe the emotional intent of your loved one or friend to determine their attempt to be manipulative. Observe their body language to peek into the mental state of mind they possess. If that state of mind indicates they are being genuine and sincere in the negotiation, pursue the negotiation down the path upon which you're proceeding.

7. Check to make sure your friend or loved one is satisfied with the outcome of the negotiation. Validate their acceptance by observing their body language. If their words and body language match, more than not, you've reached the end of a successful negotiation.

Finally, when all else fails, throw these tactics out the window and give your loved one or friend what they want. After all, if you can afford to, go ahead and give in, give up, and get what you want, if the cost is not too high. Don't let the value of the relationship hang in the balance of the negotiation. If the relationship is worth you not winning the current negotiation, in order to win in another aspect of the relationship, you'll still come out ahead... and everything will be right with the world.

* When you negotiate, with loved ones and friends, set firm boundaries upon which the negotiation will be based. Try to maintain those boundaries throughout the negotiation.

* Pay closer attention to the body language (nonverbal signals) coming from friends and loved ones when negotiating, even more so than you might when negotiating with people that don't fall into these categories. You know the emotional makeup of your friends and loved ones. Use the insight you gain from observing their body language during the negotiation and you'll gain greater leverage.

* When all else fails, If you can afford to, let your loved one or friend have the perception of winning the negotiation. In the end, if the relationship becomes stronger, both of you are winners.


Tell others about this page by Digging it:



Share and Bookmark This Article on Other Sites
NEW! Share Your Favorite Videos and Articles with Your Friends on Facebook using the OneMinuteU Facebook Application.


Loading Playlist...
This article gives the reader insight that allows ...
Views: 14037
 (1)
Is silence really golden when negotiating? How can...
Views: 4879
 (1)
Why is it that statistically, women traditionally,...
Views: 4718
 (1)
This article gives the reader insight that allows ...
Views: 2990
 (0)
This article gives the reader insight that allows ...
Views: 5553
 (0)
This article gives the reader insight that allows ...
Views: 3697
 (0)
This article gives the reader insight that allows ...
Views: 4739
 (0)
This article gives the reader insight that allows ...
Views: 3434
 (0)
This article gives the reader insight that allows ...
Views: 3652
 (0)
This article gives the reader insight that allows ...
Views: 3066
 (0)
When you're negotiating and someone calls you a na...
Views: 3902
 (0)
When you negotiate, how do you cringe? Or better y...
Views: 5843
 (0)
When negotiating, what's the best way to handle co...
Views: 3442
 (0)
How many times have you encountered a situation wh...
Views: 3080
 (0)
When you negotiate, how do you position your offer...
Views: 3486
 (0)
When people negotiate, they want to experience aut...
Views: 4369
 (0)
When you negotiate, do you consider the impact of ...
Views: 4020
 (0)
When you negotiate, what role do you play during t...
Views: 5772
 (0)
When you negotiate, do you make allowances for the...
Views: 32748
 (0)
When you negotiate with friends and loved ones, do...
Views: 3376
 (0)
When you negotiate, do you negotiate subliminally?...
Views: 6127
 (0)
When you negotiate and lose control of the directi...
Views: 7700
 (0)
Sometimes, when we negotiate with people that we p...
Views: 4073
 (0)
There will be times when you will have to negotiat...
Views: 3892
 (0)
When you negotiate, the questions you ask, and the...
Views: 3588
 (0)
Have you ever looked for something, did not see it...
Views: 3292
 (0)
Recently I found myself negotiating with a former ...
Views: 3666
 (0)
Do you think it's easier or more difficult to nego...
Views: 2983
 (0)
In tough economic times, you can still achieve suc...
Views: 3680
 (0)
What happens when you don’t have bona fide negotia...
Views: 5627
 (0)
One cold wintery night, a business associate pulle...
Views: 5094
 (0)
This negotiation lesson is not about watching some...
Views: 3889
 (0)
When you negotiate, to what degree do you think th...
Views: 5866
 (0)
Can’t we all just get along? Sometimes not … When ...
Views: 3537
 (0)
When you negotiate, do you observe meanings convey...
Views: 2593
 (0)
In a business environment, when men negotiate with...
Views: 3939
 (0)
Reading body language when you negotiate can be ve...
Views: 3595
 (0)
When you negotiate, who are you? To be more exact,...
Views: 3203
 (0)
In tough economic times, you can still negotiate s...
Views: 3289
 (0)
When you negotiate, to what degree do you allow ti...
Views: 3527
 (0)
When you negotiate in writing, compared to face to...
Views: 3469
 (0)
When you negotiate what roll do you allow innovati...
Views: 5526
 (0)
I was recently asked by a friend to critique a neg...
Views: 3476
 (0)
When you negotiate, are you bewildered by an oppon...
Views: 3637
 (0)
When you negotiate to what degree should you discl...
Views: 7982
 (0)
Before you negotiate, do you consider how your pos...
Views: 4163
 (0)
In the last negotiation lesson, I expounded on the...
Views: 7098
 (0)
When you negotiate, do you consider the degree of ...
Views: 6767
 (0)
When you negotiate, do you consider the degree of ...
Views: 9212
 (0)
When you negotiate, especially during difficult ec...
Views: 3517
 (0)
When you negotiate, when does “no” really mean “no...
Views: 7256
 (0)
When you plan to negotiate forcefully, check your ...
Views: 3246
 (0)
Have you ever observed politicians when they negot...
Views: 4761
 (0)
When you negotiate, you can get whatever you want,...
Views: 5034
 (0)
When you negotiate, are you prepared to negotiate?...
Views: 3654
 (1)
When you negotiate and you have ‘inside informatio...
Views: 3569
 (0)
When you negotiate, do you negotiate at the right ...
Views: 6919
 (0)
When you negotiate, you can advance your point of ...
Views: 3533
 (0)
When you negotiate, do you know where you’re heade...
Views: 3334
 (0)
When you negotiate, if the negotiation is not movi...
Views: 3082
 (0)
When you negotiate, what’s in your mind?
Views: 3174
 (0)
When you negotiate, does it help to deliver a verb...
Views: 3970
 (0)
When we negotiate, most of us have ‘missing links’...
Views: 3205
 (1)