Create Emotional Plans Before Negotiating Forcefully
When you plan to negotiate forcefully, check your emotions before and during the negotiations.
» Step 1
Before you begin to negotiate, create an emotional plan to assist you in progressing towards the goals of the negotiation. In essence, your plan will become your roadmap and the mental makeup you might possess during the negotiation will impact the overall outcome of the negotiation.
The purpose of developing a negotiation plan offers many benefits. When you incorporate the emotional state you might possess during the negotiation, along with that of the person with whom you’re negotiating, you enhance the plan’s viability. A few of the benefits are …
1. A negotiation plan that incorporates the emotional state you might find yourself in during the negotiation helps you stay focused on the overall goals of the negotiation. Assessing and incorporating the emotional state of the other negotiator can uncover potential nuances he might project into the negotiation.
2. If unforeseen occurrences creep into the negotiation, (i.e. loud outburst, sedateness) or something that’s awe-inspiring, an alarm should occur within you, due to the fact that you had not considered that aspect of the negotiation. This in turn should serve as a reminder to call a ‘time out’ (not address the new occurrence until you’ve had adequate time to evaluate its consequences).
3. A plan should allow you to maintain control of your emotions, if you know you’re the type of person that is easily influenced or manipulated by others, or easily persuaded to action by your emotions.
Most people make decisions based on the emotions they possess at the time of their decision. Then, they justify their decision with logic. If logic does not allow them to rationally justify their decision, and the emotion is strong, that person will discount the value of logic and pursue the course they’re on. Too many times after negotiating, people find themselves in a quandary. As the result of not being completely satisfied with the outcome of the negotiation, they beat themselves up and curse the outcome when the emotions that lead to their actions have subsided.
You have to know yourself and take into account the mental perspective you possess and the perspective you’ll have prior to sitting down at the negotiation table. You should also mentally project yourself into the mindset you think you’ll possess during the negotiation; by doing so, it will serve as a dry run and better prepare you for the negotiation (This is an exercise I have each and every client go through prior to any negotiation session they enter into).
In addition to assessing your emotions, you should also give careful thought to the emotions of the person with whom you’ll be negotiating. If you don’t know what the other person’s emotional level, makeup, or dispersion might be, go through several scenarios, so as to ‘estimate’ where their emotions might lie; the purpose for doing so is to create an emotional sparring partner from which you’ll be able to create greater emotional control within yourself during the negotiations.
When you negotiate, don’t search the ether for emotions that should be kept under control. If you maintain control of your emotions throughout the negotiation process, you won’t find yourself being held captive by an unforeseen force that causes you angst about what you really want from the negotiation. By maintaining control of your emotions during the negotiation, you’ll be in control of yourself and increase the chances of a favorable negotiation outcome … and everything will be right with the world.
The Negotiation Lessons are …
· Don’t allow your emotions to lock you into a cement trap from which your negotiation position becomes immobile. Engage in negotiations from a non-emotional perspective and mentally you’ll be more fluid in the options you evaluate during the negotiation.
· When developing a negotiation plan, try to envision what your emotions might consist of throughout the negotiation. If you plan to negotiate forcefully, try to sense and really feel the emotions you might possess. The more you can experience your emotions before sitting at the negotiation table, the more equipped you’ll be at dealing with negative emotions that could distract you during the negotiation.
· From time to time, practice altering your emotional state of mind to seek understanding of what ‘sets you off’. By identifying traits you possess that cause you to become upset or very excited, you’ll gain knowledge of how to control those emotions. Then, during negotiations, you’ll have better control and command of those emotions.