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Mentality of Negotiating

» Introduction
When you negotiate, what’s in your mind?
» Step 1
The proper frame of mind is very important to obtaining a favorable outcome to any negotiation. That should not come as a revelation or something new. What may be new is how one can obtain the proper mental outlook and make sure you maintain it throughout the negotiation process. In order to do so …

1. Be prepared. Before entering into a negotiation, you need to prepare for the ‘what if’ scenarios you might encounter. To the degree you cover those types of potential negotiation situations you’ll be more flexible. In so doing you’ll also be able to project more confidence and control throughout the negotiation. By being prepaid, you’ll be mentally positioned to project the image you wish the other negotiator to perceive. Thus, the image you project will cast your proposition in a manner that will be conducive to the direction in which you’d like the negotiation to go.

2. Display confidence. Have you ever heard the cliché’, if you don’t have it, fake it, until you make it? As you negotiate, your body emits nonverbal signals that telegraph your thoughts. An astute negotiator can interpret those signals (body language) and get a glimpse into the influence her offers and counteroffers have on you. If your demeanor becomes deflated, downtrodden, or one displaying dejection, your negotiation position also takes on that same demeanor. Once your negotiation partner recognizes that demeanor, she knows where your ‘soft spots’ are and can influence your behavior in order to manipulate the negotiation to her advantage. When negotiating, don’t let the absence of confidence be the potential cause of you not maximizing the outcome of the negotiation.

3. Be magnanimous. If the negotiation situation warrants it, be magnanimous. Have you ever observed someone that appeared to have everything they need? Their mannerisms personifies completeness. The display of such an attitude emits an aura that cast the individual displaying it in a light of someone that comes from a place of abundance. When you negotiate, if you display such mannerisms, you’ll be perceived as someone that can take or leave an offer posed by the other negotiator more easily. If the other negotiator perceives you in such a light, he will be less likely to challenge your negotiation position stringently. He’ll also be less likely to haggle extensively over an issue to the degree that he might have otherwise.

4. Use language with which the other negotiator is familiar. When you speak, the words you use convey meanings. To be succinct with your communications, you have to tailor the verbiage you use and the manner in which you present information. You should be very careful not to talk over or under the other negotiator’s head. In essence, you want to make sure you’re really communicating and not just talking.

During a negotiation, a negotiator will be bombarded with thoughts, ideas, and attempts at misdirecting his position, for one that is more favorable to the other negotiator. That’s nothing more than a tactic. Any negotiator that’s savvy should expect and be prepared to address such a tactic. After all, misdirections can serve as distractions to alter the course of the negotiation and more than likely, they’ll be used by both parties in the negotiation.

In order to maintain the outlook you’ve set for the negotiation, you must be laser-like and possess a dogged determination to reach your negotiation goals. To some degree, you’ll be able to use the actions of the other negotiator as an incentive to stay on one path versus another. By possessing an optimistic mindset and looking for opportunities to inject that attitude into the negotiation, you’ll be better positioned and perceived as such. That in itself will serve as an advantageous tactic for you. Unless it’s appropriate, don’t be like the person that was overhead saying, “They keep messing with me like, I have something to do with what they want. (This sounds like someone airing their frustrations.)“

Once you perfect the art of maintaining a positive mental attitude when negotiating, the more your negotiating outcomes will become more perfect … and everything will be right with the world.


The Negotiation Lessons are …

• In order to achieve a better outcome when you negotiate, maintain a positive mental outlook. Project the appropriate image in which you wish the other negotiator to view you. Then, use your positioning to out maneuver the other negotiator in order to win points throughout the negotiation.

• As you negotiate, the way you display and the level of your confidence has a major role in the negotiation. The more confidence you display throughout the negotiation, the better your negotiation position will become. A display of confidence during a negotiation will keep your negotiation partner off balance. Confidence displaces weakness.

• When you negotiate, always remember, life becomes reality as you live it. Also remember, reality is shaped by the mindset you possess. During negotiations, project the right mindset and you’ll project the reality by which you wish to be perceived.

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